Well, guess who's hogging the limelight again! He's going to be interviewed. Forgive any hysterical laughter at this point but he's going to talk about being a great detective, a man who couldn't find his own shoes without Laura's help (somebody else's precious painting, yes, but not his own shoes).

I just know he's going to do that face, that supercilious face he does when he's playing Remington Steele to impress the masses. I just hope they don't ask him the hard questions, like, "What's your name?" because we're still waiting for him to get back to us on that.

I know it's a case and I know Laura will be watching him like a hawk, but it makes me nervous whenever he does anything more dangerous than smile for the cameras. He's not Remington Steele. He forgets that. Sometimes, I think Laura does too.

I was a little dismissive when Steele claimed our murderer was a ghost, but I confess that seeing the ghost for myself shook my scepticism briefly. However, I later checked the room where various people thought they had seen the ghost of Tom Donovan and I found an array of technical equipment perfect for faking ghostly activity.

Steele came as I was looking it over. He found something. I don't know what. He's so intent on winning his bet that he refused to share evidence with us. A bad mistake, I suspect. He makes as much use of evidence as a duck makes of an umbrella. He really should just hand things over to the real detectives.

Wanna know the really scary thing? Last night, as we searched for a killer, I found myself calling out for Steele!

A friend of a friend (well, I think she was just a friend, she seems to have other ideas) was found dead on campus. It seemed a difficult case to solve, a locked building mystery with some very unusual elements. That was why I asked Laura to help. That and the fact I thought some time working together might ...

But that doesn't matter. What does matter is that she brought HIM. She knows I didn't ask for him, she knows I don't like him being around and here he is, playing detective around people who know and respect me!

It gets worse. He's now firmly convinced he's a detective. I blame her for that. She encourages him to get involved when we decided at the start that he wouldn't. Anyway, he was bragging. We dismissed his boasts. Next thing I know, he's betting her a trip to Paris against a year of his life that he will solve the case first. So, if he wins, she goes with him to Paris, and I don't think he's going for the sightseeing! If she wins, he gives her the hard facts about a year of his life, probably over dinner.

I hate this. I really hate this!

The last reunion-type thing I went to wasn't a huge success. Apart from the host's bizarre suicide with the party game of accusing each other to follow, Steele turned up. I can forgive Alan his sick game, but can't quite forgive him for inviting Steele, or Laura for not destroying the invitation before Steele found it.

Well, this is my old college, and there is no way he is invited. Let's see him crash this party!

I'm looking forward to it. I haven't seen the guys in years. It'll be good to relive the old days for a while. No cases, no autopsy reports, no smooth English conman making a move on any nearby female.

I don't like leaving them alone together, but it can't be helped. I can't stop Laura liking him and I can't stop him trying. All I can hope is that he doesn't take advantage of my absence.

This is just great! Morrie Singer hit me over the head, knocking me out and then, when I recovered, called me a swine and lectured Laura and me on our relationship and how unfair it was to Steele.

The fact is that I knew Laura long before he came along. I knew her before Wilson came along. If anyone has the right to be involved with Laura, it's me. Fine, so she's not interested, but that doesn't make wanting her to be interested a terrible crime. What has he ever done to deserve her?

Sometimes I wonder what I'm doing here. Everyone, even a stray jewel thief, seems to think I should back off. Of course, if I leave, who'll comfort her when he gets bored and vanishes? Besides, he is never going to be a competent detective.

We were staking out Morrie Singer's place and I decided it was time to tell her exactly how I felt. I really thought it would be fine. I thought she'd look at me and say, "The truth is, Murph, I didn't realise until you kissed me that I feel the same way."

She didn't say that. She was kind. She was cruelly kind, not even allowing me the comfort of anger. She was so sweet and apologetic and I couldn't even see the look on her face because all I could see was his face smirking at me. Whatever she said, what stops her caring for me is him. If he didn't exist, she'd see me.

He's not gonna make her happy. As soon as he gets bored, he'll go. I have so much more to offer. I could give her a real commitment.

Well, I'm not ready to give up on her yet. When she snaps out of her infatuation with him, maybe I won't seem such a dull alternative.

I finally did what I've always wanted to do. I just grabbed her and kissed her and it felt great. She was a little surprised and not as eager as I would have liked, but she didn't slap me or scream or anything. I think I have a chance.

Even better, he walked in and saw it. He saw me kiss Laura! Take that, Steele! He's now convinced she has feelings for me, even if she's not and maybe he saw something between us that she didn't, because Laura doesn't always know what she's thinking.

Tonight, she and I are going to be working together again. I can continue this then.

I kissed her and he saw me. Life doesn't get much better than that.

Our client, an intelligent and discerning man, has decided he doesn't want Steele within a million miles of his case. Who are we to argue with a client's wishes? So it's Laura and me, the old team.

This will be great! If Laura and I are working closely together, without a certain charmer interfering, I may finally get a chance to tell her how I feel. It's not impossible that she feels the same, or could, especially if I can get her to spend less time with him.

He's the reason why I've never had a chance with Laura. I'd be a fool if I didn't take advantage of this golden opportunity.

She's still looking at him like he's something special, which he is, but not in a good way. Apparently, she likes him drunk. If I turned up drunk, would she suddenly find me attractive?

How do I compete with a guy like him? He oozes charm and eloquence. All I have is sincerity. She never stops talking about him, "Mr Steele says ..." "Mr Steele thinks ..." Not often, he doesn't.

She acts like a schoolgirl over him. One of these days, I'm just going to say, "Laura, I love you." And she'll probably just talk right over the top of me and, when she does, guess who she'll be talking about!

She knows what he is. Why doesn't it matter?

Guess what! The Marcall case made Steele think of a movie. Well, I'm surprised. The movie he picked this time was "Murder on the Orient Express" and it has convinced him that all our suspects are equally guilty. Laura listened to him.

So now, the great Remington Steele will gather four murder suspects at the victim's home and talk about the wonderful acting in an old movie until Laura brings him back to the point and he makes a fool of all of us. Sounds like fun, right?

I must admit, though, his theory may actually be right. He's not as stupid as he seems. To be honest, nobody could be as stupid as he sometimes seems.